What better way to enhance any relationship than to freely offer generous words of kindness, caring and gratitude? This is such a simple action, but I believe it is too often overlooked as we sometimes tend to take those close to us for granted. And even if we sincerely care about our child, parent, friend, spouse, partner -- do we tell them often enough? Do we reassure them that we are there for them? My own mother had a difficult time saying "I love you," not because she didn't feel it, but because of her upbringing. The attitude of parenting in her time was more stoic. Those warm, gushy "I love you's" were frowned upon -- and that was the parenting mode that my mother had modeled herself after when she became a mother. I know that she loved me dearly but the flow of emotion that is generally encouraged today was lacking in my childhood experience. It was only as an adult that I was able to break away from negative past patterns, and develop the boldness to say a heartfelt "I love you so much" to her, something that had made her oddly uncomfortable in prior years. She began to return that warmth verbally as well. It was so beautifully satisfying that we were able to share our feelings later in life, because all too soon my mother was gone. The point here is to have the courage and the motivation to let those close to you know how important they are, how much their presence and caring adds to YOUR life. Validate their meaningfulness to you. Often and joyfully acknowledge the vibrancy of their bond with you. Think about how amazing YOU feel when you are told that you are loved, needed, adored and respected! It makes us simply glow when we hear these tender words from close family and friends. So bring endearing statements into the lives of those surrounding you. In addition to those classic statements of "I love you" and "I care for you" make sure in include short, but powerful phrases such as: "I appreciate you." "You are important to me." "I am so happy that you are in my life." "When you smile, I smile!" or "When you feel good, I feel good!" "Your well-being is of major importance to me." Make a real effort to integrate these kinds of statements into your everyday conversation. Say them with meaning, with feeling and of course in your own authentic words. This kind of talk on a regular basis is heartwarming to all. Knowing how I felt about my mother's obvious lack of "I love you" statements, I went in the opposite direction with my own children, keeping the emotional and verbal affection overflowing for them. Despite years of divorce and related issues with their father, bestowing those affirmations of love upon my kids kept them close to me. They knew I was there for them and they were secure about my unconditional love. They are now adults and we share strong communicative and loving bonds. Affirmations to help you focus on kindness and caring: • I love to see people's joyful reactions when I tell them how much I care. • Every day I take time to express genuine kindness, consideration and respect toward others. • Thoughtful, loving actions toward others is an important part of who I am and what I do.
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Sheryl Schlameuss Berger is a Reiki Master Teacher, who believes that joyful, harmonious relationships contribute to a balanced and healthy lifestyle. She is also a firm believer in the mind, body and spirit connection. Visit www.reikihealthylifestyle.com for Free Instant Access to a dynamic 3-pack of Positive Living Steps with Affirmations.